Ending the year with a BANG

Literally. So I have a story to share. It cracked me up, so I thought I would post another adventure in the life of Kate on this blog so others can get some enjoyment out of how ridiculous I am. Tonight, I pulled a "Kate". Pulling a "Kate" can involve hurting myself, forgetting something important, doing something stupid or absent minded, or doing something really random that no one can really understand why except to just say, she pulled a "Kate". This current example contains many of those criteria.

Tonight, I was getting dressed to go out for New Years Eve. Now, my bathroom is connected to a walk in closet. There is a door on the closet and a door to the bathroom itself. This closet door is ALWAYS in my way because it opens into the closet and therefore I am constantly squeezing around it so I can go behind it. Pain. Whatever. The bathroom door opens into the bathroom and I am constantly walking around this as well. Some engineering genius was having a bad day when he designed my bathroom/closet. So, I had just finished doing my hair and make-up and was trying to find a top to wear. Now, if you're a girl (and maybe a guy, I don't know), you put on a shirt, and then walk to the mirror to look, and then go back into your closet, over and over. In the middle of this process, I put on a shirt and walked out into the bathroom from the closet, squeezing by the door going into the closet. As I squeezed out of the closet, I turned to look into the mirror, thus cracking my bony elbow on the other door leading out of the bathroom. It was one of those bangs that makes you want to laugh and cry at the same time and maybe yell for your mother. I grab my elbow, wobble over to the edge of the bathtub and sit there, laughing at myself, rocking, and saying, "make it go away" out loud.... quite a scene. If Isabelle could laugh, she would have been laughing and pointing at me I'm sure.
After a few minutes of this very scientific way of making pain go away, it subsides enough for me to resume what I was doing. I walk back into the closet and I am glaring at the door, and then it occurs to me- why don't I take it off the hinges? Brilliant.

So, I walk out into my kitchen in my underwear, grab my tiny bucket of tools, and go back into the closet. The hinges are on the inside, so I close myself into the closet and begin removing the pins. The top one comes out without using any tools, which was promising. It did however get hinge grease or whatever all over my hands. I'm thinking to myself, only you would start doing this in the middle of getting ready to go out while you're all clean and ready to go. Then I move down to the next hinge. This one is tricky. So I take my screw driver and put it on the bottom of the hinge and hammer it up, so that the pin will come out the top (are you following me?)
This is working and eventually, the pin pops out the top-- only now the screw driver is inside the hinge where the pin used to be. I thought, OK, I'll pull it out and move on to the next hinge. Well, easier said than done. That sucker was stuck. I go to open the door, and surprise, can't open it. So now, I am sitting in my closet, in my underwear, with a throbbing elbow (there is like a lump that has formed) and I am trapped. I think about where my phone is in case I need help getting out, and yep, it is on the other side of the door. So, I did what I always do when I get myself into these situations-- I sat and laughed out loud to myself for a few minutes. Then, I began pulling on the screwdriver. Luckily, I eventually got it out (obviously, because it's not like my computer is in the closet right...?)
I finished taking the other pins out and successfully removed my door! I moved it to the back of my closet where it is still totally in the way! (Not surprised, while I was excited that I successfully removed it on a whim, it often works out that my spontaneous plans aren't perfectly executed.) It is great to not have to move around the door, and there is a lot more light in my closet.
The only problem is now I have to clean my closet because if anyone comes over and uses the bathroom, there is no way to hide the pigsty behind the door....

So, all in all I ended up with a door in a weird spot of my closet, grease on my hands, and a throbbing elbow- all in about 30 mins. I do feel like I avenged my elbow though....

Happy New Year everyone!!!

This Rules.

I hope the ridiculousness of this can brighten someone's day. It definitely brightened mine....



There is so much undiscovered talent out there....

O.J. Is Goin' To The Clinker

I just read that O.J. Simpson got sentenced to at least 15 years in the slammer for whatever he did this time. Listen, I have no idea what it was. I heard it had something to do with breaking into some one's hotel room for memorabilia or something in Vegas. The thing is, the guy is a fricken idiot. He obviously murdered those two people years ago- you would think that someone who just barely squeezed out of 2 homicide charges would take his sorry self and go buy an island outside of Dubai and hide out for the rest of his days-- I mean, that's what Michael Jackson did. But no, this dumb dude has to go and write a book on if he "hypothetically" killed his wife and her friend, how HE would have done it and gotten away with it. I mean, COME ON PEOPLE. This guy is not only a scum bag, but obviously a murderer- who, by the way, had his attorneys hide his assets so he wouldn't have to pay full restitution the the families of the people he murdered. And what was the deal with that ridiculous car chase? The man was already in the hole he dug- now he goes and breaks into some one's hotel room wielding weapons or whatever. It's like he started tossing dirt into his own grave. I am so glad that he is finally getting what he deserves- not only for the horrible crimes that he has committed, but for being such a fat-headed moron.